Musings

I've come to this page several times over this past month tyring to get something down but it has never come to anything. When I went off facebook early this month (sorry I'm no longer there), I thought of writing a long entry on how I felt saying goodbye to it.. haha.. Then I thought of writing about how much time I feel I'm losing this holiday cuz I haven't been able to finish a single book though I've started on so many.. :D  Point is, I think I stopped myself writing them because it was just so mundane.  (Even if I think blogs sometimes can actually make the most boring stories become fascinating tales ) So I was thinking.. maybe it's time I moved on to greener pastures.. In other words, I think I need to do some changes to this blog.. It has long occured to me that my musings here mean only so much to the writer. Me. Of course I aim to please others too in the sense that I always hope that whatever is shared here can touch somebody else o...

There's this joke I think you must have heard about students' excuses for not getting homework done - cuz the dog ate it :P.. Well I kinda was given a similar excuse like that because someone skipped class last week - because his cat died (and he was depressed). In a moment of anger, I quickly scoffed the excuse and said `you expect me to believe that?'.. only to regret it much much later because the student was telling the truth. In my defense, my anger had stemmed not only from that one incident but was an accumulation of frustration and anger I had felt but never quite expressed... Moral of the story: it may have felt good to go into an anger spree moment (since at the end of the class I had taken extra time to scold the guilty ones at the expense of everyone else in the class -it wasn't just one student who had skipped class..).. but it just left a bitter taste in my mouth and in my heart after I recalled all the things I had said to them :( And this is coming f...

I was once a student like you who when it came to studying, needed silence. It made me think better and also absorb more. I suppose I'm no different now than I was before - I work better when everyone else is asleep :) When do you think I have time to write here? Of course it's during these rare occasions of solitude. Been harping about writing to my students for weeks now and rarely do I try to put myself in their shoes and think about the challenge of writing. Maybe because it has become second nature to me.. I keep telling them that in order to be good at writing you simply must write. Just write anything to start with. But later on what is needed is also a reason for writing, plus an audience, even if the audience is yourself.. ;) So today, I'd like to write a letter. Something I haven't done in a really long time. Simply because facebook, twitter and instagram have all `taken over' in narrating the story of my life ..(on some days).. In the spirit of writte...

So here I am, almost 3 months since I last wrote and almost half awake trying to tap away some epic post to add to the list of ramblings on this blog. I'm probably like my daughter who has been mastering the art of staying awake just so she can play with her toys and run around happily hiding behind curtains and testing Mama's patience and strength to stay awake too.. :p Clearly the days of being able to stay up (even till 11pm!) have left me. It is during this time that I pray for energy and maybe some form of `youthfulness' to spring from me so that I can keep up with an active 2 year old. These are really the joys of motherhood.. and I feel blessed to be able to experience it ;) Yet I still do savour the moments when she's asleep and I try and squeeze in all the time I can manage to do what I like. But mostly it's me doing things that I have to, rather than those that I'd like to do.. haha.. And that is life. Or more like an example of the choices we al...

As with the beginning of a new semester, I'm all pumped up to embark on another journey of teaching.. There's nothing like the novelty of meeting students for the first time. Well at least in my case, it's technically the first time even though the students have been in college for a year. Clearly, having to take over a class from another teacher is not much different than getting a fresh new class. Yet as much as I accept the new faces, I'm often reminded of the old ones who have left. I try to remember the things I did in their classes and hope that I can be a better teacher, if not the same one. Teaching is kinda like riding a bike, you don't forget how to do it. Once you're standing in front of those eager faces, it's non-stop talking from then on.. haha.. Well.. anyway.. this is me, probably, trying to express my resolutions in so many words. Trying to envision lessons that will be inspiring, uplifting and most importantly of benefit to the studen...

A friend asked on facebook recently what was your guilty pleasure. She openly admitted that hers was going away on work trips (lucky her to get to travel a lot) and being away from her family (husband and 2 kids). Which is why it is called a guilty pleasure because first, you should feel bad (guilty) about admitting it but at the same time you should enjoy it all the same. Being an oxymoron, the moment you admit to having it (a guilty pleasure), it kinda makes you feel that you're saying something you're not really entitled to. But yet you are..  I suppose the dilemma most mothers have is that. The part where you love spending time with your children, but deep down you're also dying to just have a moment to chill with friends, go shopping, finish that book you've started and maybe just finish a meal in one go.. Sounds like me :D Well I didn't comment on the facebook status of my friend for fear of revealing a part of myself to people who don't even know ...

I have just finished watching this scary movie which I refuse to let haunt my sleep so that's why I'm writing at 1.30 am and listening to love songs.. (so they can drown these scary thoughts that something is standing behind me right now..) It was a stupid ending anyway so I shouldn't really feel scared.. After about a week since my holidays I have to say I am much rested (from thinking of work). But as a mother to an active 20 month old baby girl I wouldn't say I am that rested :p So here I am yet again grabbing this me time where I can type away on this laptop and listen to some sappy music. Mind you, on most days I would be asleep just as soon as my baby sleeps. The perks of putting your baby to sleep- you get to fall asleep too and not feel guilty about it :D Clearly I'm rambling.  Will come back and write with more gusto and something much better. good night.............

When things come to an end it can either be a much-awaited or dreaded time in your life. Ending the IRP session last week was somehow a mix between the two.   As I write this, my dear students are struggling to finish the last leg of the race to the IB exam. A scenario I have been able to witness these past 6 years. In my attempt to be a little melodramatic, I told them over a round of cupcakes on the last day that it was time for me to let go of their hands. That they are now going to go to battle without me. It's funny that as teachers, all you want to do is give them all the help that they need. But of course most of the time, what you can do is only give them a little push and shove and the rest is up to them.   In the past I've always had trouble saying goodbye to my students. But I'd like to think I've evolved from the clingy teacher to the one who can now let go. I have to believe that all has been done and pray that God will enlig...

As far as I can remember, whenever I was asked to write down my hobby, `reading' always appeared on my list. I probably have to thank my mother for inspiring the interest in me and my siblings.. We were surrounded by them while growing up and I remember sometimes taking the pleasure in just holding a book and smelling it. Ok, that sounds creepy, but it's not what you think..;) My eldest sister is now the one who pushes us to continue reading.. She's probably the most avid reader among us and everytime she buys a book and finishes reading she'll leave it at my mum's house and we all take turns reading it. Recently, another sister of mine left a stack of her books at my mum's and I delightfully took one home as my latest read.. When I opened the cover to the first page I was surprised to see that it was a book I had given her as a birthday gift 7 years ago! I had no recollection of ever seeing or buying it. If not for my note and signature inside, I wouldn...

If you ask me what's one of the most common excuses of why people ask for a break up (in a relationship) it would be because "I need space". Not that anybody ever used it on me, but since I've lived some number of years.. I think I can surely say that this is true. As cliche as it may sound, `I need space' is used for the obvious reason that the person who said it is probably reconsidering why he/she suddenly doesn't feel like continuing the relationship and therefore needs time(space) to think.. or maybe because they just feel that they indeed have no space - to think, feel, breathe or move about, due to the nature of the relationship.. And as much as it hurts to be told so, I suppose those words may actually ring true. I recently attended a conference on education and teaching and learned something new about space. In one of the sessions I attended, the speaker was talking about creativity and how we can be creative. One of the ways of how we can be ...

Considering this is my first post in the year 2013, it really should be something grand. Yet here I am, stealing a moment of "free-ness" and paying a visit to this dusty blog of mine with nothing much to say except that I may have just baked my 300th cupcake! This is what I've been up to since my absence.. haha.. Baking after 10pm seems to have been the trend. Always after the little one has gone to bed. Then often finishing at 2..  I'm amazed at the strength I've had to endure with such little amount of sleep and going into class looking all `fresh' and important.. :p I suppose that's what happens when you do something with passion. Allah has been by my side to help me get through this, thank you Allah. It's kinda funny since almost all of my orders have been from colleagues at school.. :D There's still a lot more to improve on. I go into many websites and feel my cupcakes pale in comparison. But I'll keep on trying.. Well anyway.. ...